I'm a geek - I admit it. In fact in some cases I'm the geeky version of geek, which means that I look at things and wonder why the hell they're not geeked up a bit more..

Take my DVD player for instance. I don't want to watch previews but I DO want to be able to semipermanently bookmark my position in a movie so that it will remember where I was at a later date when I reinsert the disk.

There should be some form of #IFDEF GEEK in appliances which permits the worthy to access to the brains of a device in some simple scriptable language.

Then it would be possible:

  • To tell your toaster, with a binary sequence of push-downs that this is a crumpet and needs special treatment.
  • Tell your TV set to have that annoying interference pattern starting two minutes before Coronation Street and lasting for one minute after - But never when the women's beach volleyball is on the other channel. And have it mute when George W is telling the world another pack of lies.
  • To get your car to toggle the engine response curve from 'Grandma' to 'Schumacher' when you take over from the missus on the drive home from her parents' place...